Consider the impact social media use has had on your own friendships, and friendships in general/on a more global scale. In what specific ways has social media influenced your connections? Use specific experiences to help make your point.

Before

Social media has influenced my connections significantly. I am able to keep up to date with many more people than I would be able to in person. On Instagram I have over 1,000 followers. I only see about 10% of those followers at most in a given year. 

My best friend lives in Minnesota, which is not close to where I live. Having a connection with him on social media allows me to continue to maintain our friendship.

After

Social media has influenced my connections in a positive light. I am able to keep up to date with many more people than I would be able to in person. For example, on Instagram I have over 1,000 followers. I only see about 10% of those followers at most in a given year.  Social medial allows me to have some sort of connection with the other 900 while still having a close relationship with my inner circle.

In the hockey world, I have played with teammates from around the world, including Slovakia, Italy, Czech Republic, Germany, Sweden, Finland, Canada, Belarus, Latvia, Lithuania and from all over the U.S., including Alaska! Their distance physically does not limit my ability to keep in touch with them online.

Then, write one paragraph in that same post detailing the specific improvements you made in the revised version and why you made them. Did they help? How did your adjustments impact paragraph length? 

In my revised response, I added more of the magic word, specificity. I added more of a specific and relatable example for my intention of the paragraph. This being referencing where all my former and current teammates are from. I also added more detail with a little more explanation to my philosophy of utilizing social media. Furthermore, I edited my response to add more flow through transitions such as “for example”. The length of my paragraphs were increased due to my adjustments, and I believe these adjustments helped in making my point more clear.